Content Warning: Spoilers for Rachel Reid‘s “Game Changer” series, especially “Role Model,” and “The Long Game.” Also, some of these songs are best not listened to at full volume at your cubicle job.

The second season of “Heated Rivalry” is currently in production, and as Jacob Tierney already has a lot on his hands, I wanted to help by supplying a few song choices I would like for him to consider for the remainder of the series. Wolf Parade’s “I’ll Believe In Anything” and t.A.T.u.’s “All the Things She Said” perfectly complemented the emotional intensity of the first season, so I did my best (A.K.A. I went through a few of my liked songs playlists) to find additional music that would fit the events of “The Long Game.”

“The Hockey Song” by Stompin’ Tom Connors

Justification: When you look up the word “hockey” on Spotify, after you scroll past all of the Heated Rivalry soundtracks, you’ll find this little gem by Stompin’ Tom Connors, a Canadian folk and country singer-songwriter. Now, you may be thinking I selected this song because it had the word “hockey” in it, and you would be correct. But I also liked the folksy beat and that it’s already popular with the NHL (which I did not know because I’ve never been to a hockey game). That might make it harder to license, but given all the free marketing the song will receive, I could see it happening.

Scene Usage: Played in the background during a montage of Shane and Ilya getting ready for their respective home games. Shane, the Montreal superstar, goes through his strict regime before joining his team, a group of seemingly polite but slightly homophobic and racist teammates he mistakenly believes are his best friends, and then dominates the visiting team. Ilya would have a slightly more relaxed day in the underwhelming city of Ottawa before joining his much lower-ranked (albeit much nicer) team and then scoring the only goal in a game that the Ottawa Centaurs would inevitably lose. They would both go home and call each other, Shane blissfully unaware that Ilya’s lonely life is slowly eroding his soul.

“To Love You More” by Céline Dion

Justification: Tragically, I did not have the genius idea to include the Québécoise Queen in this fictional soundtrack (that honor goes to Patience, my visionary friend who read “Heated Rivalry” before it was a global phenomenon due to her love for MM romances, and upon finally watching the show was able to say, “Wait why is this story so familiar?”). Although I’ve never been to Montreal, I must assume Celine Dion is playing everywhere because she is a goddess and the best thing to come out of Canada since free healthcare and Nanaimo bars. As for the song, while Shane and Ilya never actually break up in “The Long Game” (thank God, or else I would have stopped reading), they definitely have their ups and downs, and Ilya seems to struggle with realizing how much Shane actually loves him, so give this song a chance.

Scene Usage: Introduced in the Ottawa Centaur’s locker room before a game by Evan Dykstra, before becoming the Centaur’s go-to post-game karaoke song. The song would also be playing in Shane’s car during one of his road trips because he strikes me as the kind of person whose mom (or dad) would leave a CD in, and he wouldn’t notice until he was driving back to Montreal and so after that massive fight with Ilya he would finally hear the song playing and would angrily eject the CD and kind of scratch it and then feel bad and buy his parents a new one. And then maybe the song would play when he proposes to Ilya, and it’s kind of corny but so what because the song totally f*cks and Shane’s going to prove to Ilya that he loves him more.

YDH by Chloe Qisha

Justification: Chloe Qisha is a London-based artist whose self-described sound is “nostalgic alternative pop,” and I would add “with a hint of Disco,” given her love for ABBA and the Bee Gees. Until she blows up, I’m sharing her criminally underrated “YDH” with anyone willing to listen. The song isn’t that deep in that it’s about how your IQ takes a nose dive while thirsting after a hot guy, but the feelings in the song are relatable, and the song itself is so light and fun. I think “Heated Rivalry” fans will appreciate the following lyrics:

“Oh, please could someone
Pass me a knife for the tension between us
Clutching my pearls at the thought of his-
Personality.”

Scene Usage: I initially pictured this song for Scott and Kip (it was my main listen while reading “Game Changers”), and I could see it being used as the background for any scenes where they’re a public couple at a Pride Event. Another usage would be for that brief period in “Role Model” where Troy is crushing super hard on Harris and Harris very much likes him back, and neither one is acting on it, and like Jesus Christ, just kiss already; you are both clearly into each other, and what are you even waiting for??? For maybe some big life-altering event that terrifies you into realizing what truly matters in life?? Anyway, then the song could resume once they actually smash.

“Sadeness” by Enigma

Justification: You’ve maybe heard this new age track before because it was featured in a bunch of random movies, most hilariously in Tropic Thunder. The track, created by the German musical project “Enigma,” is composed of techno-dance beats set to Gregorian chants and sensual flute melodies. Although Ilya comes from a canonically Russian Orthodox background and wouldn’t likely listen to Gregorian chants, I also come from an Orthodox background and think they’re cool, so it’s fine.

Some minor Happy Hagfish lore: I first heard this song while watching the box-office bomb “Boxing Helena” (yes, it was during a weird sex scene). I tried to get one of my friends to choreograph a dance to it, but she refused, and now the world must suffer that loss.

Scene Usage: Any scene where Shane and Ilya bang it out. They go to town on each other a lot in “The Long Game,” but if you need a particular scene to imagine for this song, then I recommend the one where Shane surprises Ilya at his house “prepped” on Halloween night because he was so turned on by the sight of Ilya in a gladiator costume. Shane Hollander, I have never been prouder of you than on that night. Have fun, you little freak.

“KBG” by Adéla

Justification: Adéla is a Slovak singer-songwriter who rose to prominence while competing on the psychological-horror/pop-reality show “Dream Academy.” Adéla spent years in Moscow learning ballet, taught herself English through American TV shows, and eventually moved to LA to pursue music. She was voted off the show, which may have been a blessing in disguise, as she’s been cranking out the hits as a solo artist (instead of singing whatever the hell Katseye‘s label is writing for them). Her single “KGB” compares her years of hard work training to be a pop star to being in the Soviet Union’s Secret Police, and humorously refers to herself as the “K-G-Bitch.” Russia and Slovakia are not the same country, but there are similarities between immigrating from a Central/Eastern European country to make a new life for yourself as a public figure in the United States. Adéla has several songs that could be appropriate for the tone of “Heated Rivalry” (especially “Red Bottoms”), but “KBG” makes me want to dance, and sometimes I don’t like feeling sad.

Scene Usage: Any scene where Ilya is feeling himself, or pretending to feel himself to not alarm the people around him. Probably at the Halloween party where he’s trying to feel like his old self before he crashes and kicks everyone out.

“Attention” by Todrick Hall

Justification: Is Todrick Hall cool or too mainstream or dated? I have no idea, but I like this song so I’m going with it. His 2019 album, “Haus Party, Pt. 1,” is an ode to LGBTQ culture, particularly themes of pride and living your truth. “Attention” is the high-energy opening number for this album does exactly what it wants to do. The song was intentionally written as an homage to “House Parties” and would best feature in the underground ballroom scene, not a homophobic locker room. While reviewing the lyrics and the themes within Todrick’s work, I was struck by how often the concept of hard work and determination featured throughout. All of the main characters in the “Game Changer” series are hard workers who push their bodies to the limit for this sport that doesn’t always love them back. The repetition of “don’t stop don’t stop don’t stop” highlighted the similarities between professional athletes and queer artists.

Scene Usage: Troy has publicly come out, is in a relationship with Harris, and the Ottawa Centaurs have defied expectations by becoming a strong contender for the playoffs. They have everyone’s “attention” now.

“Dictator” by Rei Ami

Justification: Rei Ami is a Korean-American rapper who rose to prominence as the singing/rapping voice of Zoey in “KPop Demon Hunters.” Rei Ami’s solo music is tonally different from what she sang in the Netflix movie, and her 2019 single “Dictator” is a two-part song that showcases dual sides of the artist. The first half is a fast-paced rap in which she demands men “bend the knee” and says she does whatever she wants. The second half is a few melancholy verses where she laments how someone (I’m guessing a romantic partner) treats her without kindness and how that hurts her sense of self. It’s a hot-and-cold song that could be broken into two separate halves, or potentially used together to showcase a character’s highs and lows.

Scene Usage: I really wanted the first half to be used in the trophy room scene where Ilya “helps remind” Shane that he’s the greatest hockey player of all-time. The second half could be used in any moment where Ilya is feeling lonely (like when he texts Shane “u up?” because Ilya misses his boyfriend and Shane doesn’t see it until the morning and assumes it’s just another horny text). OR, this song could be used in its entirety for Ilya’s character journey (acting confident on the outside to hide his sad, creamy center). So when he’s with Shane, he’s a dictator and on top of the world, but by himself he’s sacrificed everything for a relationship that often leaves him feeling isolated.

“ADD” by Khantrast

Justification: This suggestion is like 99% joke, but it’s so insane I’d love to see it in a movie or something. Khantrast is a Brooklyn-based rapper, and his song “ADD” is an anthem to hooking up with neurodivergent people (otherwise known as “gumping it,” which I will not be linking to). The opening lyrics are:

“And I told her I don’t discriminate
I love a neurodivergent
Don’t care if it’s adhd or the tism,
Long as the head game working.”

I’ve seen the word “diabolical” attached to descriptions of this song, and I completely understand why someone might be offended by this. As someone who can identify with more than a few of the conditions, it’s kind of nice to hear from someone who doesn’t make a big deal out of it. I had a debilitating panic attack a few days ago that I’m still reeling from, but my recovery time would have halved if someone told me “sorry about your brain but at least your ass got the dump.” Like, yeah, I’m a little messed up, but my ass does got the dump! Thank you!

Shane Hollander is canonically on the spectrum (although he seems to be unaware of this), but that doesn’t stop him from being one of the hottest dudes in the league, nor from picking up his fair share of baddies (or maybe just Ilya and Rose, but those two count for a lot).

Scene Usage: This song is part of Ilya’s pre-game playlist. He sends it to Shane as a joke, and Shane doesn’t get it.

While crafting this list, I tried to avoid music that was too well-known or overplayed (or too recent), but as you can see, I didn’t entirely succeed. Some of my choices might be too on-the-nose. An embarrassing number of songs I considered had previously featured in episodes of “Grey’s Anatomy,” confirming that my musical tastes are at an unfathomable level of basicness.

This list needs a few additions, especially in the “Ilya is a sad, sad boy” and “something cool in French to play under a serious conversation” genres. If you have any recommendations, please do!